and i made myself a shake. a delicious peanut butter chocolately number that was simply divine. and then i washed each and every piece, dried them, and put everything back in the box and left it next to the kitchen table because i knew the shakes would be a repeat offense. fast forward to 2AM. and being rudely awakened by shitler with a rough shake and the following words: "hey. HEY. did you use the blender we got as a wedding gift?" as i blearily tried to understand what the fuck was actually happening shitler shook me again and asked the same question and when i rolled over to look at the clock and processed what was happening i was all "no shit sherlock yes i did use it. what gave it away?"
and at this point it finally dawns on me that it's late as balls and shitler has had some cocktails and he is apparently quite miffed that i've used the blender. so the conversation continues and shitler says "but i don't understand why you would use it. we agreed that we weren't going to use any of the wedding gifts until we bought a house." and i was all "i wanted to make a shake. how do you propose i do that without a blender?" and shitler was all whiney and went "but we were supposed to use these gifts together..." and i was like "OMG it is 2AM. what would you have liked me to do?
tape the box up and act like i never used it?" and he quietly murmured "well, yeah." and then i rolled over and barked at him to shut off the lights and go to sleep.