Friday, July 25

cross your fingers. and toes.

 photo my-body-is-ready-cat-g_zpsd3cf351e.gif
that cat gif just felt right.
and also fitting for a friday.  or i guess any day really.

but i have a plan and it's something that i need to discuss with you guys and also i'm going to need all of everyone's positive energy sent my way in hopes that it will work out.
so newsflash i don't want to work the second job tonight.  surprise, surprise.

and the deal is is that i'm not a liar.  so you won't find me making up some bullshit excuse about not being able to work because i'm sick or something.  and i won't not do that because of my moral compass or anything.  mainly i won't do that because i'll forget whatever i made up as my excuse and end up posting something on facebook that will get get me busted.  like go figure i'll be like "I AM SO VIOLENTLY ILL I MIGHT DIE."  and then i'll get drunk and forget and post a picture of me chugging peppermint schnapps or or something and the owner of the restaurant will be all "glad to see you're feeling better."  and then i'll be drunk and won't know how to respond and then everything will be ruined.  so typically i like to err on the side of honesty mainly to save my ass.

but i digress.  back to my plan.
the plan is that around 10AM i'm going to text the manager and i'm hoping that the conversation will go something like this:

shannon:  HEY JOHN.
john: yes?
shannon: i'm probably going to no call, no show for work tonight so could you just tell me that i don't have to work tonight and save us all the trouble?
john: fine shannon.  you don't have to work tonight.

and then this will be me:

also please note that me no call, no showing was a total bluff on my part because i'm such a giant pussy and also it's just not nice and i would not and have not ever done it.

p.s. his initial response his my favorite.  it's like he know that whatever is coming at him next he's not going to like.  it kills me.
post signature


  1. Hmmmmmmmmmmm I'm gonna be honest ... that doesn't sound like it'll work. But you go ahead and try it and report back to us. :)

  2. Okay. So how did the text go.

  3. That's pretty freaking amazing. I'm jealous.

  4. if only every job worked like that... well then i guess no one would ever show up so never mind

  5. ok but really how on god's green earth did that work??????????? i'm..... in shock.

  6. So I love that he is playing the part of the parent who is trying to "let you make your own decisions" but still throws in the guilt trip a little bit lol.

  7. Hahahah....glad you've got a cool boss like that. I doubt too many would have that reaction lol

  8. I'm so impressed by your skills.

  9. hahaha I think you have ESP[N] or something.

  10. OMG the cat at the beginning... I've been sitting here watching him for what feels like 6 minutes. That is too funny. Yay wonderful bosses, but holy cow that cat is hilarious.

  11. honesty is the best policy unless you're me and then you totally get F'd. lying also gets me F'd so I'm always just F'd. perpetually F'd and not in a good way.
    one time i accidentally broke a window in my apartment building (building not my actual apt) and no one saw or heard so i could've just let it go and pretended i didn't do it but instead i called and was all "oops, i'm soooooo sorry. it was an accident! waahhhhh!" and ya know what happened? i had to pay for it and it was a lot because regulations had changed from the time they originally installed the window to the time i broke it, changed from breakable to non-breakable glass mind you, and it turns out that non-breakable glass costs like a zillion dollars.
    i just can't win. :/ and i'm super jealous that your honesty got you out of work and made you a gun toting, unicorn riding, badass cat.



leave a comment.
you know you want to.

Back to Top
Copyright © gin and bare it: cross your fingers. and toes.