Tuesday, October 29

november? more like no-shitler.

remember when everyone lost their shit over the month of october?
i do.  it was an explosion of pumpkin related shit and people so excited that i thought this was the first time they had ever encountered an october in their whole entire existence.  cute.

but really november shall be glorious.
aside from everyone having meltdowns over no-shave november, which is slightly annoying, considering my entire relationship with shitler is his own version of no-shave november that just lasts for eternity so this bearded thing is nothing new to me and i've always loved it so shove off you band-wagon beard fans.
i'm out of breath from typing that embarrassing sentence.  sorry.

this november marks a month where i will only have to see shitler for three whole weekend days.
xmas came early this year folks.

and no - no one is going hunting for shitlers.
shitler is going to go out into the wilderness and participate in the war on deer.

first saturday of the month shitler is doing a side job.  which, also,  i've decided to force him to do more of.

secondly - do you know who says things like "i might have to have like four bachelor parties because i have so many friends?"  shitler does.  that's who.  and then it makes my brain feel like exploding.  but the first bachelor party kicks off this month in the wisconsin dells with all his boyfriends from college.

then there's widow's weekend.  which up until this year i have never had the pleasure of experiencing.  but for those that are unfamiliar it's always the weekend before thanksgiving that is the opening weekend of deer hunting and every man i know is out in the wilderness to murder things (deer - relax).  and i'm kind of pulling for shitler to not get a deer on opening weekend because his absence thanksgiving weekend is contingent upon his kill count (or lack thereof) on opening weekend.

everyone is always so serious about the hunting and the quiet and it all seems awfully boring.
so in my mind i'm going to picture shitler doing a lot of frolicking. 

and posing.

and peeing.

but he's very serious about the war on deer.
just ask him and his imaginary gun.

but no one serial kill me now that you know i'll be living in solitary bliss.
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  1. Soooo what kind of planner is that? it's pretty. :)
    Enjoy your man-free November. I'm man-free every day. Unless you count Walter. He's more needy than most men so....yeah.

  2. I love that you are excited for him to be away. Cue tears of joy that I'm not the only one who appreciates a good chunk of time sans a man.

  3. That picture of Shitler frolicking is the best thing I've seen all week.

  4. The shitler picture of him frolicking.. I lost it. Have fun baby doll! Whatcha gonna do? Catch up on some trash television and vegetate?

    p.s. I think Shannon and Andy are going to the dells.. maybe you should just pop in for a blate of some sort :)

  5. 1. i really like your handwriting. Mine looks like crap.
    2. i get it, the men in my life always leave to kill things. I had to plan birthdays and weddings around it.
    3. real men frolic. I've seen it.

  6. I have to say I am so glad you threw that line in there about bearded band wagoners. I love me a good beard, always have, always will and I find it freaking annoying that because of "Duck Dynasty" women are now beard obsessed. Enjoy your weekends!

  7. I. too, am with a man who will spend a good chunk of November sitting quietly in the cold woods at ungodly hours (because that totally sounds like so much fun...? I don't get it.) I'm not all that bummed about alllll the extra 'me time'. I plan to spend it on my warm couch, drinking wine, and screwing around on the twitter :)

    Also, I second Jess' comment above that you have handwriting worthy of envy.

  8. I have never minded the beard thing too, mostly because I have always been surrounded by sports guys and they don't shave for superstitious reasons. The Shitler frolic is the bees knees!! Enjoy your man free weekends!!

  9. Again... you make me laugh in my cube when I am sposed to be working. I too love the facial hair. My ex could not grow a beard to save his life so I divorced him. Not really, I just got tired of being married to a jackhole:) Happy weekends!

  10. The kangaroos on the edges of your planner make me giddy.
    John doesn't hunt, but deer are fucking assholes.

  11. Wheeeeeee! I'm super excited for a man-free weekend (or two) myself! But I could do without the beard.

    1. are you excited because we get to spend some of those weekends together without the mens?

  12. Everything about this kills me. I love it.

  13. "i might have to have like four bachelor parties because i have so many friends?"-this is awesome.. it must be tough having so many friends. too funny.

  14. When I saw "no shave November" I thought you were talking about legs and I got really excited. Wimp, wooomp.

  15. I've been with a beard for 4 years. No band wagoning here. And the beard is hot. Sometimes.

    I wish Blake hunted so I could have some alone time. Yummm.

  16. i like the roos on your planner. GIMME!

  17. i don't get over to your page as often as i (obviously) should. i'll work on that. because every time i do get to read your stuff... it makes me giggle.

    also. you've pretty handwriting. i'm a little jealous. no one can read mine. even me, sometimes.

  18. god, I need to arrange a jose-less month.

  19. You have to remind me to check on you this time because I am bad at remembering.

    I felt really bad for you for a minute until you said "xmas came early" and then I giggled like a crazy woman.

  20. All I've learned from this is that I need to date someone that hunts! I'm sort of kidding.


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