2// i got home from the gym and grocery shopping and attempted to clean some things and then instead ended up laying on the couch eating jalapenos chips and watching old seasons of the real housewives of orange county (thank you hulu) in the same feet smelling shirt i had sported at the gym. and then shitler came home and he made pork tenderloin for dinner (which is hilarious because we had just cooked seventy-five pounds of it last week so it just seemed super redundant) and then we watched orange is the new black and then my pony tail felt too tight so i took it out. and then a few minutes later shitler looked at me and said "did you just do something to your hair? it's really pretty right now." and then i felt like i was back at the gym because i kind of wanted to mouth at him " who me?" and then look behind me to make sure he wasn't complimenting a different girl's hair but no he was totally talking to me and it was weird. and then, since i was caught off guard, i answered his question with a question and was like "i took it down?"
p.s. the smutty kindle porn book was entitled "wallbanger." that shit makes me laugh. you can buy your own copy here and then read it and then we can totally talk about it. we could form a smutty kindle porn book club and life would be grand. minus the compliments.