Wednesday, September 17

shitler the blushing bride

if you're new around these parts - WELCOME.
if not - hey you're addicted to this trainwreck; like a crack you can't quit.  but it's cool because i'm not harmful to your health.  at least not that harmful.

but this blog is mostly about nothing.  and when it is about anything it's usually just random stories and pictures of shitler (and sometimes the dogs).  

so maybe shitler is my muse.  but don't tell him that.  
his ego is large enough as it is.  

which brings me to what i would like to tell you today.  shitler is the perfect subject for any and all photo taking.  i swear his eyes light up when i whip out my camera and it's just an instant show and i just click to my heart's content and usually end up with some sort of gold mine of loveliness.

with that being said i wanted to share a story from the one time i got married.
an anecdote, if you will.

so after everything was done.  like after all the ceremony crap and the vows and such our one-hour photographer took shitler and me on down the beach and started taking pictures.  i will say that i typically gush over all the gorgeous portrait shots of all the pretty bride ladies and i'm always all "UGH I WILL NEVER LOOK LIKE THAT."  but then people are like "just you wait for your big day, you sure will."  and i'm here to tell you that i proved all those people wrong (i actually don't think anyone told me that but it was mainly just me reassuring myself in my head).  first and foremost our photographer didn't speak english so he brought along a translator and giving that i was slightly buzzed off of champagne i wasn't really comprehending the things that they wanted me to do (like the by myself shots).  the translator lady kept taking my flowers and whipping her hand back behind her and then the photographer would gesture wildly and all excited like "YES!  that's it!  that's how you do it!"  and i was all like "uhhhhh i don't get it.  like this?"


and as you can tell from my face i was clearly questioning whether or not i was nailing this.
and the answer is no.
and then they kept trying to demonstrate.  but in like the same way they initially tried to show me what to do and i couldn't help but think "uh that clearly didn't work the first time so maybe try a different way or maybe we could just skip this pose entirely because i'm remedial."  but not - they kept trying.  and then i like slightly gave up.  and then they took this photo.


i call that one "I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU WANT FROM ME I'M BAD AT THIS LET'S PLEASE STOP."  but then shitler stepped in and said "you would be a terrible model.  you don't know how to take direction" and ripped the bouquet from my hand and demonstrated, to a tee, what the photographer wanted.


and then i tried one more time.


and still failed.
so.much.awkwardness.

so the moral of the story is that it was shitler's day, he's a way better model than i will ever be, and also i'm terrible at taking direction.

Wedding Wednesday


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