Friday, January 3

this has no title

i deserve some sort of reward for showing up to this blog two days in a row.
i would suggest that someone buy me a drink but i've decided to make a bold decision and give up booze till i get married.  which, if you're counting, is four months away.  also i've decided to go cold turkey on everything delicious.  so basically no carbs, no sugar, no salt, no tasty treats.  because i feel like i'll never have a better reason to not be chubby ever again other than getting married.  so i should just man up and be miserable for the next four months.  sidenote - if you're my friend on snapchat then you'll remember the snap i sent you last night of shitler eating a sandwich in bed?  please know that i stared at him eating that sandwich like some sort of beggar dog.  it was embarrassing. 

but whatever.  here's a semi-recap of this weird week.

1// shitler did some ice fishing.  but it was like balls cold out so really he just set some tip-ups and watched for flags from inside the house.  it's equal parts genius, pussy, and loser.

2// samm was in milwaukee and made the trek out to okauchee to get drunk-ish with me.  THAT'S WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR.

3// so apparently there's a new show coming out called "king of the nerds."  something about being the ultimate "nerd off."  you can read about it here.  but more importantly one of the nerds looks exactly like shitler and i about fall off the couch each and every time there's a preview for it.

4// uncle rico and those big sad eyes.  BECAUSE YOUR DOG LIFE IS SO RUFF.  rough.

because duh, obviously.  packers beat the bears.  NFC NORTH CHAMPS YA'LL.

that's all i've got.  i'm going to go chug a bunch of water.  like so much water that i want to explode.  but hopefully that will dull the hunger pangs.  the ones that are trying to convince me that it's ok to gnaw off my own arm.

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  1. Since the Browns suck and my husband is a Packers fan and I love Aaron Rodgers, that picture cracks me up. My husband was a little nervous when he saw that Rodgers shaved the 'stache though because he was worried it held all his powers.

  2. I don't even know what to say because the thought of not putting anything delicious in my mouth for 4 months makes me want to cry and punch things.

  3. Ummm...I can go without booze but I cannot go without delicious stuff! Good luck.

  4. I have SOOOO much blog catching up to do and look at you posting and shit. And not drinking? YOU MONSTER. Please convince me I need to do the same. 4 months and 1 day for you!

  5. I can't wait to send that to my one douchebag Bears fan/friend. He's always giving me shit about my Lions. Thanks!

  6. You and your fucking fudge packers can lick a dirty taint.
    But regardless... I still love you. I hope that this newfound sobriety will lead to more finger puppets. We all know that was a good idea.
    Ps. I wanna be your fucking snapchat friend.

  7. don't give it all up! i mean, i guess do but cold turkey always fails for me.

    Also why aren't we snapchat friends?

  8. I gave up drinking and it's been 4 months... Not as hard as I thought. but you are brave with the no carbs, no sugar, no good stuff!

  9. Go girl! I thought about giving up booze for about 3 seconds before I got a hold of myself, but I'm giving up all the other stuff too in order to get healthier, so we will suffer together

  10. I don't care about NFL football but that Packers pic made me laugh so hard when I saw it on the facespace earlier this week.

    This post also makes me want to eat a sandwich.

  11. Cold turkey on booze and good food? Who are you my friend?! But it will make it that much better the day of your wedding. I thoroughly enjoyed a 20 piece from McDonalds while getting my hair done on the day of our wedding. Hey a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do.

  12. No booze OR carbs? Will you at least take pills???? DO SOMETHING!

  13. Ugghhh I have just made the same no carbs promise to myself as my wedding is in 6 months. I give myself a week. Max.

  14. Four months without booze? BAHAHHAHAA

  15. NO CARBS?!?!?! Did you confuse New Years with April Fools? I hope so. (Also, I refuse to talk about that last picture. RUDE)

  16. I feel like you're going to be a huge bitch because of the whole no alcohol/sugar/salt/carb thing. I don't think hitler will appreciate a cranky bride. Think about it. :)

    1. and by hitler, obviously I meant shitler. Don't shun me, blog world.


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