i swear this will make sense.
because i work at a sushi restaurant.
and i just had my vagina checked out last week. BY A DOCTOR.
and then an awkward moment occurred.
as in that awkward moment when you're working at the restaurant and you go up to your new table, make eye contact with the lady that's dining with her family, and then realize it's your gynecologist.
because that 100% happened last night.
i'm not sure if i'm fresh in her mind.
because i can only imagine that she sees like tons of vaginas every day.
and maybe since i'm not in the proper spread-eagle-feet-in-the-stirrups
gyno position is why she didn't recognize me.
but that's probably for the best.
because how do you explain that to your husband and children?
"kids. hunny. mommy's fingers have been inside the nice waitress. can you pass the california roll?"
in other news. my phone reminded me that i'll be riding the crimson wave soon.
that phrase is both hilarious and terrifying.