Friday, March 22

high five 4 friday

with all due respect i'm not that excited about the fact that it's friday.
because i have to work.  all day.  and then also tonight.
and then there's a work meeting tomorrow.  and then i want to get my vagina waxed.
and then i have to go back to work at night.  so it's not really much of a weekend.
unless you count blackout sunday (as whitney calls it) as the one day of the weekend where i will perhaps get beat up drunk and then be a piece of shit hangover mess on monday.  but only time will tell.

but onto high-fiving and backing up asses.

1. why do i continually convince myself that piercing things on my body is fun?  like ok ear cartilage that hurts.
but i do it anyway.  the last time i pierced my ear cartilage like eight years ago in college i might have either been hungover and/or still drunk because i ended up almost bleeding out all over my white sweatshirt.  and it hurt.  fast forward to three years later when i decided to get my nose pierced and that hurt like a bitch too.  then fast forward one more year when i woke up hungover and itching to get my nipple pierced and just up and did it and it ended barely hurting at all.  but then last night my friend was all "wanna go get poked with me?" and i was like "sure, that sounds like a good time, let's do it."  but then there were like four young skanks in front of us getting ears and navels pierced and then some weirdo named chad who kept checking out the minors getting pierced right in front of their moms and me and the friend are like "this is weird and it's making us uncomfortable and we aren't even the parents but oh well.  CHAD - SIT DOWN."  so then i made the good choice to get my cartilage pierced again.
because apparently eight years and a lot of booze makes you forget that it did hurt the last time.  but i strapped in anyway and sure enough it hurt again.  and then they were all like "you're white as a ghost and your lips are turning blue.  lay down and drink this soda."  and then the snarky tattoo guy is all "there's always one."  and in my head i want to scream "I SWEAR I'M NOT A PUSSY."

i wish this picture more accurately captured the dried blood.

2.  i'm going to go ahead and channel last weekend when we attended a birthday party for our neighbor's daughter who is both adorable and a riot.  she was affirmative in her NOT wanting to try on any of the clothes she got (who could blame her?  that shit is not fun.) and after shitler put together her giant car thing she gave him a modicum of credit when she declared that he "helped a little."

3.  after continually seeing blog after blog after blog that contains husband worship i thought that i would give a shout-out to those of us ladies that are on that certain level that makes us more aware that the sun doesn't, in fact, shine out of the asses of the men in our lives.  here's a sample of the communication between me and shitler.

4.  i'm going to backtrack again to last friday for a hot minute.  because i literally worked from 7am to midnight and then came home and decided the most appropriate thing to do was take shots of vodka by myself because i wanted a buzz and i didn't have the patience to wait for the effects that a drink would have. and then i decided that taking photos with my dog and then frantically cleaning the kitchen would also make sense.

5. lastly - this made me lol.  hard.

one more thing.
it's #backthatazzupFriday with whitney.
so let's do it.  pour some of your sizzurp out for that guy from D12 that died.

p.s. it's the clean version.  where it talks about hills and not pills.  
i know - i'm not happy about it either.
but deal with it.

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  1. hahahahaha I love you so much it's not even healthy.

  2. ok. that text message killed me.

    and bill likes my titties. cause i got biggins.

  3. I've had my tongue (twice), nose, two holes in each lobe, my cartilage, bellybutton (twice) ...I think that's it? pierced. And when I say twice, I mean on two separate occasions. I have a penchant for taking out the piercing and then putting it back in. Unfortunately, I got a "real" job back in 2008 and most of the less appropriate metal came out. Boo.

  4. OMG I love love love the text message! So what I write on a daily basis

  5. Hi! I'm a new follower.. Cute blog! I dig your sass, and I look forward to reading more of your posts!
    XO, Rachel
    With Love, Rachel

  6. I have the double whammy cartilage hoops on my right ear and love them but no, I would never get the outer cartilage pierced again. That shit takes forever to heal and I can't handle only being able to sleep on one side of my head for months. I really want to pierce my conch but I know it would take forever to heal and I just don't want to put up with it all again.

    However, I got my rook pierced several years ago {and then again two years ago because I took all my shit out for my wedding and it closed up super fast} and it healed super fast {both times} because it's so happy and shielded inside the ear. I highly recommend it for next time you're feeling like piercing something. It's my absolute favorite.

  7. Ouch, the cartilage piercing stories solidify for me that I'll never get another piercing!

  8. my hubs had is Rook pierced and he said he nearly passed out from the pain.

    i'm a total pussy; i got my ears repierced because kayla wanted to get her ears pierced and wanted me to do it with her and i nearly cried!

    1. i am not that into it at the moment.
      considering it's taken away some sleeping options. but i'll get over it.

      i had to google the rook. i never know what all the piercings are!

  9. So I had my cartlidge pierced in college and took it out like 5 days later because it hurt to sleep on. Also it hurt to hold a phone to my ear and back then, phone calls were important.

    I also wanted to say that I will take you and Shitler's convo's any day over all this ooey-gooey shit I see on the blogs. But, that is because I like inappropriate stuff.


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