because i woke up and then promptly fell down the stairs.
i blame my socks - which have whales on them - and coincidentally it probably sounded like something whale-size was falling down the stairs. and like my life didn't even flash before my eyes.
mainly because i was like a first-time parent and frantically/overly concerned with the well-being of my iPhone.
so on this monday i only have some scraped fingers and a bruised ass.
let's take a look at the scoreboard.
what about the weekend, you ask?
the weekend was a bust and i did nothing fantastical.
i came home from work after a fourteen hour workday on friday and immediately got hysterically excited when i saw that my crap from forever 21 was waiting for me.
it included some jewelry i didn't need and also a pair of shoes that i've been waiting for my whole life. so imagine my disappointment when i tried on the shoes and realized they were a size too small. and then imagine the nightmare i'm envisioning when i'm going through the fact that i'm going to have to fill out the stupid return/exchange paperwork and then ship them back and then wait for them to ship the size that fits.
but then it dawns on me that maybe there's a forever 21 at one of the dreaded malls. so i google. and find that there is, in fact, a forever 21 that's only thirty-five minutes from me. so the next morning i head to the mall (which i'm convinced is one of the seven circles of hell) to see if i can locate the shoes of my dreams in the correct size. but i was promptly reminded of why the mall is practically hell on earth. because if you enjoy feeling like you're at the club at 10am and also enjoy being generally ignored by everyone working at forever 21 then i suggest you drop everything you're doing and head there right now. suffice it to say - i'll have to resort to mailing the shoes back on my own because it was impossible to get any sort of help from any living breathing human being that worked at that store.
on the bright side - i met my new best friend bernie.
but literally. my weekend was filled with nothing except working, then working out, then eating healthy type foods, and then going to sleep.
please tell me about yours.
let me live vicariously through you.