Saturday, April 20

freedom doesn't taste like french fries

i'm not sure if it's normal to cry tears of joy when shitler leaves for a weekend or a night but i do.
because then i don't have to endure his constant ridicule when i lay on the couch and watch eight hours of bravo television that i've already seen like six times already.  or when he rips on me for only leaving the couch to go to the bathroom.  or when he tells me stop being obnoxious with all my picture taking.  or when he just gives me the side eye when i buy myself flowers because I'M SPECIAL AND I DESERVE IT.  or when i blast JT's new tracks and dance with the hounds.  or i'm spared his judgement when i'm outside screaming "GODDAMN FROST?!  are you kidding me with this shit april?!"

please see the evidence below.
this is mah jam dawgs!

best $7.04 i've ever spent.  ever.
we have just a couple of more things to cover.
first - i found these videos from the weekend of all the northwoods nonsense.
you're welcome.  like seriously.

lastly.  i leave the door open like this on the reg.
and i have an insane irrational fear that a raccoon will waddle it's way in and take me hostage.
i'm not even kidding.  so i should probably just shut the door.

happy saturday'ing.

Gin and Bare It


  1. "get out of my asshole"...

    said no one...


  2. Doesn't your house get cold when you leave the door open like that? haha. I am glad that it costs $7 in the states for Starbucks too. Because when I got Starbucks for the first time in... I dunno, almost a year the other day, I about fucking fainted because of the price.

  3. THE FUCK. Over achiever. I'd be jealous except I'm posting a post today too. So whatever. That second video scared me.

    You're awesome sauce. You and your Saturday posts. So far mine is like a book long. I'm hoping no one actually reads it.

  4. I done with the bullshit weather too. it's here in omaha and I hate it!

    1. UGH - WHERE is summer.
      it's honestly driving me to be crazier than i already am.

  5. This needs to stop. I am actually afraid that I wrote this blog post, that is how similar it is to my life.
    I live for the days that G works late, Why can't men just let us sit on the couch and take pictures of all of our food?
    I listened to Mirrors on repeat today when I got ready, I am not sure that my father appreciated it.
    I saw a raccoon last week in my parking lot and I cried for like 20 minutes because I thought it was going to scale our balcony and kill me... just ask G... he was not pleased.

  6. I have a fairly rational fear that a possum is going to come into my window if I leave it open at night. and thus, I do not leave it open at night. At all. Ever. It scares me.

  7. Do not mess with Mirrors. That's my shizzle. Seven times in a row. Seriously.

  8. I'm overwhelmed. Well, not underhwelmed, not overwhelmed maybe just whelmed. Pretty sure I spelled all of that wrong

  9. Me time is sacred.

  10. I know the feeling... In my case, it's more of a "Oh, thank god you're leaving so I can read my blogs without you running out of your bedroom every five minutes to tell me the latest plot twist in Fringe."

  11. Haha... I love your blog! And your posts.... I can sit for DAYS watching Bravo television... shoot... does that mean we have a problem???!!!!

    1. NO we don't have a problem.
      it basically means that we have great taste and more people should be like us.

  12. Up your asshole....really, no wonder you were happy he left...Adios Shitler...see you tomorrow after Bravo! Oh and bring us back some Stahhhhbucks...thanks

  13. Whew! I can't wait to read more! I'm a new follower through the GFC collective blog hop.


  14. It got cold again here too!
    New follower from the bloghop!

    1. for the love of all things i wish the coldness would stop.
      it's embarrassing how excited i get for moderately warmish weather.

  15. I have had enough of this weather too. The skunks couldn't wait any longer so now we have snow and skunks. Argh!
    New follower from the blog collective.
    Lindsay (

    1. whoa whoa whoa.
      skunks? that's a deal breaker.


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